Only One Way Through

22 April 2013

"We cannot release or discover or heal by the use of our minds alone. The brain must follow the heart at a respectful distance. It is our hearts that ache when a loved one dies. It is our emotions that are most drastically affected. Certainly the mind suffers, the mind recalls, the mind may plot and plan and wish (and wish and wish) yet it is the heart that will blaze the trail through the thicket of grief." ~ Carol Staudeacher from A Time to Grieve

Some survivors - like me - try to think their way through grief. That doesn’t work. Grief is a releasing process, a discovery process, a healing process. I am a fast griever. When someone I love died in the past I cried all day long for a couple of weeks and then sort of limped through the grief until I felt better. Losing my daughter was like someone ripped the deepest part of my soul out of my existence and torched it. I understood The Inferno on a cellular level. I cried every day all day and night for months and then all the time when I was alone. Now the tears just randomly break through at odd times when I least expect them - like last night around 3 AM when I was sound asleep.

Erica KitzmanComment