Guilt over not knowing that she had the kind of OCD that presents as persistent suicidal thinking.
Guilt over having children, and inflicting my own OCD on them. My guilt was so strong during the first few years. I will never know what gave her such sadness in her present and fear of her future. There came a point when I had to stop myself from asking - when I had stop thinking about reasons. I had to come to terms with never knowing.
27 May 2012
I've been reading about OCD lately. I had no idea it's so distressful in the more severe forms.